Guest contributor, Lindi Davidson—Spiritual Director, Retreat Facilitator, and writer—shares wisdom and insight on her explorations into the soul work of less. [1]
I threw myself onto the bed with an agonizing sigh. My husband was in the room and asked what was wrong.
“I’m just so sick of the sound of my voice!” I yelled through the pillow.
He chuckled. “Good.”
So, I resolved to say less.
In the days and weeks that followed I learned about the less than edifying ways I use speech:
- I didn’t know I used speech as a form of control.
- I didn’t know I over-explained because I was looking for affirmation.
- I didn’t know I re-phrased, reiterated, and repeated (*ugh*) because of my deep desire – not to be authentic, but to control perception – to be seen and perceived ‘just so’.
- And I didn’t know my compulsive (not always excessive, but compulsive) speaking was an attempt to stroke my own feeble ego and maybe even get a pat on the back.
Saying less proved to be more exposing than I had hoped.
In Luke 17:11-19, Jesus is on his way to Jerusalem and from far off these lepers see Him and start hollering, “Jesus, have mercy on us!”
Jesus hollers back, “Go! Show yourselves to the priests!”
And so it was, that as they went, they were healed.
As they went, they were healed.
As they went …
Jesus had a pattern of engaging with those who sought Him.
He asked what they wanted, and gave them a command: What do you seek? What do you want? Do you want to be made well?
Then He’d say:
- Go! Show yourselves. Follow me.
- Do not weep, wake up!
- Return to your house and tell what great things God has done for you.
- Cheer up. Go in peace.
- Don’t be afraid, just believe.
- Little girl, wake up!
- Get up. Pick up. Walk.
Jesus spoke and continues to speak simply and directly. His conversation was brief, but His emphasis on movement, healing, and restored relationship were high.
For me, the practice of saying less forced me to stare at all the things I left undone.
Rather than relying on expressing myself with words, or ‘having a conversation about it,’ I was invited into one of two camps: action or rest.
So I wonder, as you explore the soul work of less in today’s intermission and as you continue sitting with this theme for the rest of the month, would you take some time to pay attention to where the stirrings and invitations might be for you?
How might saying less invite you into more?
And when you feel a stirring, may you remember that clarity, courage, and healing follow on the heels of Jesus’ commands:
- Go! Show yourselves. Follow me.
- Do not weep, wake up!
- Return to your house and tell what great things God has done for you.
- Cheer up. Go in peace.
- Don’t be afraid, just believe.
- Little girl, wake up!
- Get up. Pick up. Walk.
-With Joy
Pause for Thought
Swiss psychiatrist, psychoanalyst, and prolific author, Carl Jung, famously said:
“You are what you do, not what you say you’ll do.”
What surfaces for you as you consider these words?
Pause for Practice
The following are a list of prompts to help you lean into the practice of saying less. Feel free to try one, all, none, or create a list of your own. Regardless of which prompt you choose, invite God into your journey and allow The Holy to lead and guide you toward greater places of growth, healing, and freedom.
- Bite your tongue in conversation to make room for more of God’s movement.
- Resist the urge to defend yourself and allow God to do so.
- Respond to prompts and spiritual nudges right away.
- Ask once, trusting that if you’ve got it wrong, He’ll be with you en-route and will continue to speak and guide.
- Reframe from the urge to clarify or explain yourself and allow misunderstanding to grow humility.
- Keep secrets.
- Protect silence when it arises.
- Welcome a spirit of rest into your spaces and places of life.
Pause for Examination
As you read through a couple of iterations from Proverbs 10:19, consider what words stand out, or what phrases seem to nudge your attention. Pause for a moment of reflection as you invite God’s Presence to examine your heart. Write out thoughts in a journal, or pray about whatever surfaces.
—Sitting With Proverbs
-
“In the multitude of words there is no lack of disobedience, but he who restrains his lips does wisely.” (WEB)
-
“The more talk, the less truth; the wise measure their words.” (MSG)
-
“Sin is not ended by multiplying words, but the prudent hold their tongues.” (NIV)
-
“Don’t talk so much. You keep putting your foot in your mouth. Be sensible and turn off the flow!” (LB)
-
“Too much talk leads to sin. Be sensible and keep your mouth shut.” (NLT)
-
“When words abound, transgression is unavoidable. But whoever restrains his lips is wise.” (TLV)
- [1] Lindi Davidson—Spiritual Director, Retreat Facilitator, and writer—lives in Saskatchewan, Canada, with her husband and four boys. She loves good coffee, good jokes, and is passionate about helping people deepen their relationship with God and experience a vibrant faith and life. Find her on IG » here.
- [2] Spiritual Practices for Saying Less by Lindi Davidson. c. 2024.
- March Artwork: “Less” by Dustin Heigh.
-
If you would like to share this issue of PAUSE – via text, social media, or email – just copy and paste this link: https://joyover.com/pause/march-20-2024
- Click here for previous month’s art offerings
P.S. As you explore the practice of saying less, may you simultaneously experience what Mr. Rogers calls, “the gift of silence.” 🤫
